Seek But Wait

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I don't wait well.  I like for the traffic to flow, for phones to be answered, for doctors appointments to be wait-less, and for my food order to be quickly forthcoming!  I tend to like now time not wait time.  And yet I find myself with you in 40 days of waiting.  Forty days of anticipation is lengthy for those like me.  What could God possibly want to say to me that takes 40 days of preparation?  Am I THAT messed up?? Or what exactly does He intend to do inside me in these 40 days?   Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan and was led by the Spirit in the desert, where for forty days he was tempted by the devil. (Luke 4:1-2a).  There are no specific words about Jesus' activities within all these 40 days so I went Bible searching.  I was looking for times that Jesus went away to pray or times where we find Him earnestly seeking, for I believe that IS this Lent journey.

Let's take a look at Luke 9:28:36: [underlined words are my emphasis]

[Jesus] took Peter, John and James with him and went up onto a mountain to pray. As he was praying, the appearance of his face changed, and his clothes became as bright as a flash of lightning. Two men, Moses and Elijah, appeared in glorious splendor, talking with Jesus. They spoke about his departure, which he was about to bring to fulfillment at Jerusalem. Peter and his companions were very sleepy, but when they became fully awake, they saw his glory and the two men standing with him. As the men were leaving Jesus, Peter said to him, “Master, it is good for us to be here. Let us put up three shelters—one for you, one for Moses and one for Elijah.” (He did not know what he was saying.)
While he was speaking, a cloud appeared and covered them, and they were afraid as they entered the cloud. A voice came from the cloud, saying, “This is my Son, whom I have chosen; listen to him.” When the voice had spoken, they found that Jesus was alone. The disciples kept this to themselves and did not tell anyone at that time what they had seen.

This entire short passage screams at me regarding these Lent days.  In fact, I believe it offers me a way to live until Easter (and actually beyond).
Here are my bullet points:
•Jesus found alone time to pray
•His depth of prayer changed Him!  As we pray, do we sincerely and honestly get so deep into our prayer time that our faces literally change?
•His hope was heaven bound. As we talk with Him are we reminded that our time on earth is passing and that soon our location to a spiritual place will come?
•Peter, James and John became sleepy! In times of prayer do I become sleepy and uninterested when in reality my whole being longs to become fully awake and realize His Glory.
•Peter, James and John decided they should camp out!  Do I forget all else and just stay with Him?
•Peter, James and John were afraid.  As He speaks to me, am I so afraid that I cannot hear His words?  Or am I so afraid of His words that I choose to not hear?

Let's think of ourselves as Peter, James and John.  Jesus loved them so much He invited them to join Him on the mountaintop.  He wanted them to experience the full measure of who He was.  He didn't want them to be scared or feel unworthy or feel condemned....what did He want for them?  What does He want for you and me?  Why would He lead us into 40 days in the desert or a prayer time on the mountain?  Think about it......ponder it for yourself.  Give yourself time to think it through.....(I can wait)...

He created us for one purpose - relationship with Him.  He wants us to see Him, to experience His love and roll around in it.  So he calls us to the desert and to the mountaintop in hopes that we will leave all the worldly trappings behind and finally recognize Him.  In fact, He is dying for us to truly SEE Him.

In my own head I've been comparing this Lent season with the Christmas Season.  This is just a small bunny trail so stay with me!  Thanksgiving ends and we are thrust into the Christmas season, head first!  We anticipate and mostly our children anticipate!  Oh, what is under the tree, they squeal!  What gifts will we get?  Packages are shaken and taped boxes are gently prodded to reveal the contents underneath.  It is so very unnerving and exciting for little children.  Because they are "dying to see what gifts they will receive."

He's dying for us to see too!  Everyday of our lives, He's dying for me and you.  He's dying for us to know Him, He's dying for us to see His full Glory, He's dying for us to see ourselves only as He sees us.  That makes me want to run into the desert and wait and seek Him forever.

We can all walk into the desert and brag that we're there for the difficulty of achievement.  But there is more He says....stay a while....40 days...seek and wait.  Wait for gifts that are there just for you.

My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”

    Your face, Lord, I will seek.

Wait for the Lord;

    be strong and take heart

    and wait for the Lord.  Psalms 27:8,14

The Work of Peacemaking

The call to peacemaking from Matthew 5:9 befuddles me.  Perhaps this is a verse that only applies to those who have the personality or giftedness of peacemaking.  Surely this is one verse that I can discount as "does not apply."  But then I began to think and remember:
Those long days of work and picking up my two elementary age children who were arguing and needing peacemaking well before we found our driveway!  I remember those same two living life as teenagers and the peacemaking that occurred in our house!  Then my memory took me back even further to my parents and our household.  By the time I was in junior high school I was the remaining child in my parents home.  There were disagreements in those days too.  I found peacemaking was easier than "walking on egg shells."  So perhaps I have some experience in this field after all...

But I'm pondering as to whether this call to peacemaking is deeper than the circumstantial situations I've described.  I wanted to know how truly interested Jesus was in peacemaking.  Upon the birth of Jesus it was announced in Luke 2:14: Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests.  In John 18, when Jesus was about to be arrested, Peter drew his sword and struck a high priest's servant, cutting off his right ear.  Jesus went into peacemaking mode and stopped Peter and commanded him to put his sword away.  Then in Luke at the death of Jesus, He becomes the peace-giver granting favor to the repenting thief on the cross.
At His birth, in His life and in His death Jesus lived peace-making and peace-giving.  So how can I?  How can you? How do I offer peace to the world in which I live.

It seems to me that I can only offer peace when I, myself have accepted God's peace within my own soul.  For you see what I have realized is that in my life I have had many peacemaker roles.
...to my parents
...at work
...to my children: Nick and Sarah
...to my brother/sisters
...in the church

But these roles have mostly focused on simply 'getting through' conflict and NOT resolving or addressing the deeper brokenness of each relationship.  True peacemaking and peace giving are at their core: genuine, difficult and oh, so worth it.  For it is in the difficulty of finding the peace that our own inner peace can be restored.  J. Ellsworth Kalas states it this way, "But how exactly does one make peace?  Nearly all of us claim to want peace...Since peace is so universally admired and presumable so universally sought after, it must not be that easy to achieve, else our human race would have won the goal several millennia ago....Most of us realize that we have conflicts within our own person - angers, resentments, bitterness, and fears."  Let's do the work of peace in our own hearts and lives.  For it only then that we can truly accept Jesus' peace into our own lives and offer peacemaking to the lives of others.

One of Jesus last great lessons occurred just before His crucifixion and is found in John 14:27.  Jesus is speaking to his disciples.....us:
Peace, I leave with you; my peace I give to you.  I do not give to you as the world gives.  Do not let your hearts by troubled and do not be afraid.

He's offering us a life of peace, He's offering us healing for our damaged emotions and our damaged selves.  Can we accept His free gift of peace?  And then begin to share peacemaking in our everyday worlds?

I've written a few times about our family's journey into the world of addiction and recovery. In simplest terms this means that as one of our members become addicted so did our lives as well.  A sickness took over our family and each member in it experienced the illness in a different way.  Each of us was hurt, wounded and suffered differently.  And for the last 4.9 years we have chosen to work toward healing.  Each member of the family is working to find recovery.  It has taken many tears, prayers, and so much honesty that my heart has ached at times.  We have found that the only true peace, and therefore our ability to offer peacemaking, has come from the most hurtful but brutal honesty with each other.  For once those old places of woundedness were touched...the healing peace was able to come in.

This peace business is not for the light-hearted.  It is not for those who would prefer to keep their honest feelings hidden.  But it is for those actively seeking peace and seeking to become peacemakers.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God. Matthew 5:9

Be brave.  Be a peacemaker today.  Be a peace giver.

Lord Have Mercy

Being a southern girl, the term, "Lord have mercy" has been in my vocabulary since the day I was born.  Every time I hear it there is a southern drawl attached and quite possible the slow shake of one's head.  It seems to be a grandma's favorite expression.  And perhaps it's akin to "Bless his heart". Both of these expressions come from deep wells of emotion where exact words seem incomplete.  Lord have mercy.....Bless his heart. And so I begin ponder Jesus' words in Matthew 5:7
"Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy."

I've struggled with this word, mercy, for a week.  Reading and reading and trying to get my mind around it.  Jesus is instructing us to be merciful, to show mercy and that I understand, sort of.  But my dilemma is the how.  How do I live a life offering mercy.  Webster helped a bit, mercy is defined as:
lenient or compassionate treatment; compassion shown especially to an offender.  This definition helps me societally, politically and educationally in application.  But Jesus' call to us in this verse from the Bible goes much further.  It states for us to show mercy so that we receive mercy and this is where the truth gets real.  These words not only tell me to show great mercy to others but they also scream that we are in need of mercy....we need and will need "compassion shown to an offender".

As I explored the mercy word all week, one of my exercises was to search the Bible for this one word.  Over one hundred verses appeared but what struck me were several New Testament verses.

• As Jesus went on from there, two blind men followed him, calling out, “Have mercy on us, Son of David!”Matthew 9:27 
• A Canaanite woman from that vicinity came to him, crying out, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on me! My daughter is demon-possessed and suffering terribly.”Matthew 15:22  
• “Lord, have mercy on my son,” he said. “He has seizures and is suffering greatly. He often falls into the fire or into the water.Matthew 17:15  
• Two blind men were sitting by the roadside, and when they heard that Jesus was going by, they shouted, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on us!”Matthew 20:30 
• The crowd rebuked them and told them to be quiet, but they shouted all the louder, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on us!”Matthew 20:31  

And then one final verse from Matthew:

• “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You give a tenth of your spices—mint, dill and cumin. But you have neglected the more important matters of the law—justice, mercy and faithfulness. You should have practiced the latter, without neglecting the former." Matthew 23:23 

The first group of these verses all reflect people in deep, deep need.  They each have cried out to Jesus after having exhausted all other means of healing or hope in their lives.  They are blind, they are suffering, they are sick both physically and mentally.  The two blind men sitting by the roadside when hearing that Jesus was going by begin shouting to Him for mercy.  And even as the crowd told them to shut-up and stop screaming for Him, they screamed all the louder....have mercy on us.  These people knew their condition.  These people knew their inability to help themselves.  No self-help book was going to ease the pain they were suffering.  No education, no job, no relationship, no church membership, no sporting event, no bank account, no country club membership, no political party, no career....they needed mercy and only mercy for their conditions were broken and bleak.

A few chapters later, Jesus uses the word mercy to a group of very knowledgeable, smart and Godly men.  These teachers of the law had given their lives to knowing God and His scriptures but yet they seemed to have missed the point.  It seems that they were relying on knowledge alone.  And He asks, where is your mercy?  Do you know you need mercy?

I've asked myself and I'm asking you today: which group are you?  Are you the blind beggar screaming out for mercy? Do you realize your own brokenness and need for mercy? Or are you standing in your church pew having missed the point?

Honestly and ashamedly, I've tended to live my life as though, "I'm doing OK".  I've been able to work out my problems and worries...or so I have thought.  But yet, there was a day that I can remember screaming for God's mercy.  When we come to the end of ourselves and recognize our true need we scream and beg for mercy only He can give.  Several years ago, while in a prayer time I suddenly found myself on my knees and then flat on my face.  Begging and screaming for God to have mercy on me and on my son.  Shouting out for God to take me, take my daughter, take my husband but please have mercy on my son.  My precious son who was caught in addiction and pain.  Our family was broken and past the point of no return...I knew not much else that day but I knew of my condition and my great need for healing and mercy.  And then, He stopped and looked at me and gave me blessed mercy.

 Lord, have mercy.  Lord, teach me mercy.

Mourning and Comfort

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted (Matthew 5:4)."

From Scott:

One of the new experiences I am having in retirement is that I now have the time to read—really read—the entire newspaper each day.  Before retirement, the morning newspaper ritual consisted of a pretty thorough review of the local news (including the obituaries—always needed to be sure I wasn’t there!) and the opinions pages.  National news received a cursory review, and the international items were almost always ignored, except for Sundays.  Just not enough time!

Now, my morning routine includes several cups of coffee and a thorough reading of the entire daily paper.  I’ve become much more aware in the last few months about our own domestic issues—the economy, partisan politics, immigration, marriage equality, and the Keystone Pipeline.  I’ve also learned more about Ukraine, Boko Haram, Syria, Islamic State, Libya, and all the problems of the world far from the relative peace and quiet we enjoy here at home.

More than ever, what rests heavily on me each morning is the degree of suffering being experienced around the world.  Stories of mass killings in African villages are reduced to less than one column inch in the “News of the World” summary; yet, hundreds are dying each day! The thousands killed so far in the conflict between Russia and Ukraine can become a mere factoid when seen as a “blip” in the daily news digest, but when one really considers what daily life is like in an atmosphere of such strife and uncertainty, a different level of gravity takes hold.  Beheadings, torture, genocide:  all of these crimes on humanity have been a part of life on the planet for years and years, but our 24/7 news coverage brings them into our awareness in new and sobering ways.  And for many of us, ignoring the plight of the world, or placing all the blame for the atrocities on one faith or another becomes the way to cope.  Christian and Jew, Muslim and Athiest...All are broken, and all are in need of healing and comfort.

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus announced, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted (Matthew 5:4).”  Almost every source I’ve consulted in preparing to write about Jesus’ message about mourning and comfort pushes me beyond personal grief and loss, such as the mourning one would experience after the death of a loved one…and beyond “blessed” being a synonym for “happy.”  Certainly many of us identifying as Christ-followers have experienced peace and comfort in the midst of personal loss and pain when we have prayed for healing, when others have ministered to us through hospitality or service.

But my study of this passage has pushed me to think about the blessing of comfort that comes out of mourning for a world in serious pain, a pain caused by the brokenness of being separated from the love of God.  That separation from God is how I think of the state of “sin.”  The pain and brokenness in our world comes from living outside the light and love that is God, and that pain and brokenness must be grieved and mourned.

It’s one thing to be “happy,” and another altogether to be “blessed.”  It occurs to me that the “blessing” of this Beatitude cannot be received until mourning takes place.  Wrapping ourselves in the safe cocoon of the local news and averting our eyes from the suffering and brokenness in the world is not our calling.  When we mourn for the greater loss, grieve the brokenness, acknowledge our part in it, and pray for the coming of peace and light, then we will be blessed by the comfort Jesus promised to a people in a world just as lost and broken then, as now.  Such mourning can spur us to action, first in changing ourselves, then in changing our world.

Poor in Spirit?

Welcome to this Forty Faithful journey.  For this period of 40 days, Scott and I will write eight
blogs for you to ponder.  We will be studying Matthew 5:1-10 and intersect these words of Jesus with the approaching celebration of Easter.  We have no predisposed outcome for you or ourselves...we are simply on a journey to know our God in a new way.  Read, think deeply and pass it on...

Forty days before Christmas was mid-November.  By mid-November last year I had Thanksgiving planned, company coming, a few Christmas gifts purchased, and the cooking scheduled!  By the end of November, Thanksgiving was over, I was stuffed and already stressed but the tree was arriving!  Stockings were to be hung, more food to be cooked and for heavens sake a party or two to attend.  It was a busy forty days as we approached Christmas.  I wrote and talked about the lack of time and the lack of concentration I was putting toward the REAL reason for the Christmas season!  The commitments were too many and my to-do list too long.  Yes, it was the birth of the Savior of the world...and we celebrated...and the hubbub kept building...until finally January 2. (or in reality after the College Football Playoff Championship game).  It was then that my world went quiet or at least back to routine.

Now here we find ourselves forty plus days away from Easter.  My to-do list isn't as long as the December one.  I haven't the parties to attend or cooking to get done.  I have few guests coming my way.  And my box of Easter decor is much easier to attend to than the droves of boxes marked Christmas.  But yet...these forty pre-days of Easter are even bigger and better and more hope-filled than one could ever imagine.  Will you think me daft if I express that these days of Easter are our most significant of the year?  This Easter Sunday celebration is THE celebration!  So how blessed we are to have moments, 40 days of moments to think and ponder as to what is coming, Who is coming!

Jesus speaks difficult words to us in Matthew 5:3.  These words are the first of our forty day journey towards Easter.

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."

These words are difficult to me because I do not fully understand their meaning and I really struggle in applying them to my life.  How is one poor in spirit?  Is it too a journey?  How does one become 'poor in spirit'?  I read a comment from Billy Graham on this question,
"In other words, when we come to God, we must realize our own spiritual emptiness and poverty.  We must not be self-satisfied or proud in our hearts, thinking we really don't need God."

Self-satisfied and proud Dr. Graham says.  Those words make me squirm for if I'm self-satisfied I've stopped looking for my satisfaction in the One.  On a daily basis, can I become poor in spirit?  I confess that many times my own will is not poor in spirit but puffed-up and proud.  Do we realize our own emptiness and poverty?  In this land of the free, American dream do we try and self-satisfy?  Are we too 'rich' in all things to truly become poor in spirit?

Surveys in the United States show that religious commitment is generally somewhat higher among people with less income and Christians in less affluent countries like Nepal, Guatemala, Kenya or China often are prepared to pay a higher price for their faith than most Western Christians. In Bible studies among students from different kinds of colleges and backgrounds [we find] that students from poor homes, struggling to pay their way through college, frequently understand this passage better than those students for whom the road is easier. Source: The IVP New Testament Commentary Series

This scripture is a call to embrace our poor-ness.  It is not a call to live as poor-pitiful-me but it's an opportunity to recognize the poverty of my soul, the complete need of my heart and then to receive the richness of the Kingdom.  If I am living a life poor in spirit - isn't every second a gift and blessing?  Shouldn't I fall out of bed in the morning and be face-down in need and in thanksgiving?

We have forty faithful days to ponder...